Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
