I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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