Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
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