you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
