brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Couch. On fire.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
