She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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