I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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