so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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