just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
