So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
