Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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