Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
