My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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