im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
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