Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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