her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Randomize