I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
