Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize