Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
