I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
