is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize