Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Randomize
