So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
