You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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