you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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