sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
