Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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