margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
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