dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
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