I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
