I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
