I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
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