the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
We have so much sex to catch up on
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
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