So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize