Bisexual people are plain selfish.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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