Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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