awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
