ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I think people are normalizing furries
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
