Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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