I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
