adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
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