Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
