yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Randomize
