Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
is that a dick in a sweater?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
