He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
