He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
