those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
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