Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
