Whod you bang
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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