Porn is love you can see.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
