Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize
