You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
she pinky promised me she was 18
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Randomize